Theres this thing called fear. it runs through me.

im fucking intoxicated. i am dizzy. wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. i got nothing to do so im blogging. my eyes are half shut and im typing. my fingers feel like they have a mind of its own. just going on and on and on. i want to feel like this. not a care in the world. feel numb. feel like lskjgdbasfuckingasgjasghaskggoodasgfja. haaaaaaaaaahahahhhahahhahahahahaaaaaaaahaha.

someday, im gonna die, die like we all do. die from old age, or maybe a freak accident. what will become of me? what will i leave behind? how the fuck would i know cause im already dead. fuck this world fuck everything.fuck this, fuck you.

go watch freedom writers.

i shall compose something random

i feel this too, its unbearable
gasoline is all i have
i am a captive, this is my jail
but ill hold my breath, until ill accept death
my neighbours they suffer,
naked with no dignity,
they have no maker
they have no liberty
this is all whats left
of an able bodied man
this breath is what you have left
savour it, everything that you can
theres no escape from this.
this painful kiss
of airbourne disease
is what i am left with
im falling from my knees
they fall with me
they fall with me
aquainted from this chamber
we all die from this gasoline
this is jewish murder
this where we've been
side by side with my neighbour
within these walls.
fall,
fall,
fall.....

Is it time? Is it contemplation time?

I cant seem to find that motivation that i had to push me to do my best.
Where have you gone?

my memory's worsening. i cant even remember much about school this morning.i dont know what date it is, nor can i recall my upcoming plans. SHIT.

i hope this daily blogging will help me in some way for next weeks english N's. i barely even passed for prelims. SHIT.

i want to talk about pride
pride is something that everyone has
pride makes you defiant
pride makes you unwilling to cooperate
pride makes you stand on other peoples heads, not on the ground
pride makes others despise you, but you still hold it high
pride makes you deaf
pride makes you blind

is it hard putting yourself below others? isnt that what we are taught to do? "serve" others?
but how do we serve if we still have our pride on our shoulders?

i think theres a right time and a right place where you can be proud, and when not to be.

everything revolves around wisdom, decisions, knowing whats right and whats wrong, choosing right from wrong.

So its best to know when to hold your head up high, and when to brush off the dirt of other's shoes.

Your friendly neighbourhood......

SPIDERMANN!!!!



See, thats me in orange.
And the other is satan.

Once you pop you cant stop.

Salutations brethren.

i just had my CLB O's prelims. it was like, peeing into a urinal, easy.( but sometimes, when no ones around, i'd like to test my long distance aiming and walk backwards while still peeing into the urinal, now thats quite difficult cause you gotta rush back to the urinal when you're almost done). yeah! first time i saw english words in a chinese paper, primary school didnt even have that. and my whole of paper 2 was MCQ, so you always have that 1/4 chance of getting it right if you arent sure of the question. i used to think that MCQ's had a sequence, but i was wrong.but thank goodness i changed to CLB. besides that, while i was having the best nap i had in a classroom in ages, i had to be awoken by my own fart. its like you know you go to sleep being conscious of farting, then when it actually happens when you're sleeping because your body gets comfortable, you just let go and then your heart starts pumping cause you cant believe that you just had a motorbike fart and the guy next to you looks at you. so i gave him a cheeky smile and giggled to myself like a little girl who perched in her panties.

i like sudden farts. its something everyone can relate to.it brings the world closer together like globalisation, and it makes the world a better place to be in.

school's over in a month, im stoked. got so many things to accomplish.
1. Get a job
2. Learn some self defense skills
3. Start gaming? maybe.
4. Recording? maybe.
5. Bodybuilding. Muscleman 2000
6. Pick up guitar again? maybe. it'll be one of those passing phases again.
7. Play jazz? another passing phase
8. Catch up with friends

that should be about it i think. anyways its time to go to tuition. time to bring out my grenades of knowledge, pull the pin and throw it in the battlefield of social studies and eliminate the opposition, which is the CBD,ALS,ERP,VQS,COE,NHS,LTTE,UN,ASEAN and the KNNBCCB.

Onward brethren!

For the Entrees

hello! i have decided to open up a blog, again. it'll be quite interesting to read my blog after i've stopped using it just like reading my old blog right now. very interesting. indeed.

i've developed a enthusiasm in poetry, but it'll just be a passing thing. just like all the other things i was enthusiastic about and lost interest like in a week or two. uncountable times. but ill never lose my metal interest

i shall update my blog when i can.because i feel uneasy using a computer thats facing the living room, where people can just walk by and look at what im doing. not safe at all know. dont like. queasy. i want to move house. NOW.
speaking of moving house, my family and i went looking at houses today. i cant imagine myself living in a 3 storey house with an attic, with 6235162345 sq feet of room space and the attic possibly a studio.i'd like that really. its my teen house dream. but i just hope father would consider and has the cash. oh wells.

k time to shower. i just realised why i stopped blogging last time. cause i sounded GAY. HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA bye.